Editing Delirious Movie Quotes

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* '''Operator''' - "Are you still holding?"<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "I've got somethin' for you to hold, lady..."<br />'''Operator''' - "Sir, if this is an obscene phone call, we have ways of tracing it."<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "I want you to trace it. I demand that you trace it! My address is…" (''Cut off - Screaming'')
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* '''[[Mark Boone Junior|Cable Man]]''' - "Geez, what a body!"<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Laura is more than a body."<br />'''[[Mark Boone Junior|Cable Man]]''' - "Laura?"<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "[[Laura Claybourne]], she plays Rachel."<br />'''[[Mark Boone Junior|Cable Man]]''' - "Sorry, you must really follow this shit."<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "No, I write this shit."
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* '''[[Louise Fletcher]]''' - "Yes, mom I got the brownies... And the mace... Mom, will you please stop worrying? Everyone gets mugged here at least once a week."
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* '''[[Mickey Schwartz]]''' - "Jack, when are you gonna stop kidding yourself?"<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "What are you talkin' about? There's nothin' goin' on between me and Laura."<br />'''[[Mickey Schwartz]]''' - "I know that. But do you?
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* '''Narrator''' - "Billionaire patriarch, [[Carter Hedison]], having recently recovered from a brain tumor, battles death once again as his ambitious daughter Rachel plots her next move."
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* '''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Jesus! When did we build this? We're gonna go way over budget!"<br />'''[[Helen Caldwell]]''' - "I don't understand. His tests were normal."
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* '''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "I am dead! I'm in Hell! And my punishment... is to spend eternity on my own show!"
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* '''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "He's operating on people? He's an actor! He's not even a good one!"
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* '''[[Dr. Paul Kirkwood]]''' - "I'm sorry, Helen. I've got to see Carter Hedison."<br />'''[[Helen Caldwell]]''' - "Carter? Or Rachel Hedison?
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* '''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "Daddy! I found out who Janet Dubois is selling her father's formula to! It's [[Jack Gates]]!"<br />'''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "The Wolf of Wall Street?
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* '''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "I suppose that's why she committed suicide... If it was suicide."<br />'''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "For the very last time... I did not hire [[Dash Andrews]] to kill your mother."<br />'''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "If she was my mother!
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* '''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "I'm a writer! Do you hear me? All I wanna do is get outta this stinkin' little town!"<br />'''[[Janet DuBois]]''' - "Well, then, do it! I mean, you say you're a writer then... write your way out!
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* '''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Ohh! Why didn't I write myself back to the stable?!"
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* '''[[Blake Hedison]]''' - "When are you going to stop this madness with Rachel?"<br />'''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "Nothing happened at the Mardi Gras."<br />'''[[Blake Hedison]]''' - "She's your sister!
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* '''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "Watch it, Blake, or I'll give you a headache you won't forget."<br />'''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "You lay one finger on him, Ty..."<br />'''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "Always protecting Blake, Daddy! Sometimes I wish I wasn't your son." (''pausing'') "If I am your son.
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* '''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Of course. It's Fetterman again!"
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* '''[[Lou Riley]]''' - "When did you start carrying a knife?"
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* '''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "Rachel, I'm not buying any more of this crap."
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*  '''[[Rachel Hedison]]''' - "So, the mysterious stranger rides to the rescue again."<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Madam, this stranger knows no danger. I am much stranger than you think.
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* '''[[Rachel Hedison]]''' - "What is it, Daddy? Is something wrong?"<br />'''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "The cable TV man is coming."<br />'''[[Blake Hedison]]''' - "But don't you have to go the stockholders' meeting."<br />'''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "You know how hard it is getting those guys to come out. I've got black bars on two and seven.
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* '''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "I've got terrible news."<br />'''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "The cable man's not coming, is he?
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* '''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "No, there's more. Gates has all these crazy notes. He knows everything about us. He knows about our phony drug tests, your brain tumour, and even my... my..."<br />'''[[Dr. Paul Kirkwood]]''' - "Amnesia!
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* '''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "What does that man want? Is he out to break us or to see us in jail?"<br />'''[[Dr. Paul Kirkwood]]''' - "If I can't have Rachel, I don't care about jail! And I hope your cable man never shows up!"
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* '''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "You can't even do that right, can you, son?"
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* '''[[Jack Gates]]''' - "This nebbish has been masquerading as me, and you believed him?"
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* '''[[Jack Gates]]''' - "I have to go to... Cleveland? Jesus, I hate Cleveland."
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* '''[[Deborah Nordoff]]''' - "Almost killed with the engaging thoracic surgeon was his philanthropist socialite fiance, Rachel Hedison, daughter of industrialist and well-known socialist... socialite, Carter Hedison. From Ashford Falls Falls, this is your Ashford Falls reporter, Debbie Nordoff."
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* '''[[Rachel Hedison]]''' - "When I'm with him, it's as if... I don't have a mind of my own. He has this... strange power over me."<br />'''[[Blake Hedison]]''' - "Maybe he's a Scientologist?"
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* '''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "Golly, I've missed you. Remember the time I was gonna ask you to the prom?"<br />'''[[Janet DuBois]]''' - "And your father wouldn't let you."<br />'''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "Uh, no. No, th-that's not true. That was the time that I got... I got, um..."<br />'''[[Edward Ashworth]]''' - "Amnesia, sir."<br />'''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "Remember?
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* '''[[Dr. Paul Kirkwood]]''' - "I thought you were announcing our engagement. Why did you ask him to play the piano?"<br />'''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "I didn't. I also didn't ask him to sing "Send In The Clowns" either.
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* '''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "So, Janet, while you're here, maybe we could go horseback riding."<br />'''[[Janet DuBois]]''' - "I don't think so."
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* '''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "You can have my room, Janet."<br />'''[[Janet DuBois]]''' - "You're not gonna be in it, are you?
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* '''[[Dr. Albert Waverly]]''' - "I just want you to know how much I enjoyed your playing."<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Oh, thank you."<br />'''[[Dr. Albert Waverly]]''' - (''confused'') "The elderly man exits."<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Great! Now I got 'em talking stage directions!
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* '''[[Rachel Hedison]]''' - "What is going on around here?"<br />'''[[Wendell Vaughn]]''' - "The bartender needs more cold deer."<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Not deer! Beer! It's a typo! Use your head, for Christ's sake!"
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* '''Voice''' - "Paul doesn't know the Heimlich?!"<br />'''[[Dr. Paul Kirkwood]]''' - "Well, of course I know the Heimlich. I know the Heimlich. I know the Heimlich! Jim, you know I know the Heimlich. Look, I love the Heimlich! I'm always doing the Heimlich. It's one of my favourite maneuvers! I'm a medical doctor!"
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* '''[[Helen Caldwell]]''' - "Mr. Hedison... Blake... I see you're still under Dr Kirkwood's care.
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* '''[[Rachel Hedison]]''' - "Janet! How are your cockroaches?"<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Ants! It's ants!"
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* '''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "Dad, you're not gonna stop me this time. I realized tonight that I'm still in love with Janet, and that I always will be!"<br />'''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "Of course you're in love with her! She's your sister!"
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* '''[[Dr. Paul Kirkwood]]''' - "It was Rachel! Rachel made me do it!"<br />'''[[Blake Hedison]]''' - "Rachel... That slut did this?"
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* '''[[Rachel Hedison]]''' - "Oh, no!"<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "What is it now?"<br />'''[[Rachel Hedison]]''' - "I forgot my shoulder pads."<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Who gives a shit?!"
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* '''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Janet, what are they doing to you?"<br />'''[[Janet DuBois]]''' - "By the way, our deal's off, Gates. The formula stays in the family and I get... fifty percent."<br />'''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "She's a Hedison all right!"
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* '''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Can you stop the bleeding?"<br />'''[[Rachel Hedison]]''' - "Yes, Paul, stop the bleeding. She's ruining the parquet floor!"
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* '''[[Ty Hedison]]''' - "But don't you see? If Janet is my sister then I still have a chance with Rachel!"<br />'''[[Ardmore Sanitarium|Orderly]]''' - "I'll make sure he's well taken care of!"<br />'''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "Don't bother."
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* '''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "Where the hell have you been?"<br />'''[[Jay Della|Ashford Falls Cable Guy]]''' - "How ya doin'?!"<br />'''[[Carter Hedison]]''' - "I'll tell you how I'm doing. I've got a black bar on two and seven. It's in the study."
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* '''[[Maury Gifford]]''' - "This is delicate work, you moron!"<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Stop yellin'! You're makin' me nervous!"
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* '''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "What are you doing here? I sent you to Cleveland."<br />'''[[Jack Gates]]''' - "I should kill you for that alone. I want that formula."<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Oh... go do a mini-series or something!
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* '''[[Jack Gates]]''' - "Nobody... crosses Jack Gates."<br />'''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Fine! "Nobody crosses Jack Gates." Great line."
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* '''[[Mickey Schwartz]]''' - "Jack? You okay? Somebody said you got hit by a truck."<br />'''[[Dennis Graham]]''' - "Trunk!"<br />'''[[Mickey Schwartz]]''' - "He got hit by luggage?"
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* '''[[Lou Sherwood]]''' - "All right, I agree. You wanna die on a sandwich you shouldn't even be eating?"
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* '''[[Jack Gable]]''' - "Look, the part of the lesbian maid is taken, but I'm gonna get you Janet."
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